“Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell in unity” (Psalm 133:1, ESV).
No one enjoys conflict, especially the kind that comes with others on your team. That kind of conflict really hurts.
While we do not like it, it will come. No team is immune to conflict. Not all conflict is bad. And not all conflict means sin is present. Sometimes it may be necessary for you and your team to go in separate directions. The departure of John Mark from that early church planting team (Acts 13:13) later resulted in Paul and Barnabas going separate ways (Acts 15:39-40).
How we respond to conflict is critical to both the overall health of the team and the fulfillment of our mission. Here are a a few matters I address in The Barnabas Factors when it comes to responding appropriately to conflict:
Let Everything be Done out of Love: Before conflict gets out of hand and results in sinful acts, team members must remember that the things they say, the actions they take, and the decisions they make are to be done out of love for one another, God, and the unbelievers they seek to reach (Rom 12:10).
Let Everything be Done for the Sake of the Kingdom: Kingdom citizens are called to live according to a Kingdom Ethic. Conflict should be settled quickly so that disciple making and church planting do not cease. Barnabas and Paul may go separate ways, but they both go preaching the gospel.
Let Everything be Done as a Witness for the Lord: Teams must be cautious in the decisions they make when handling conflict because the world is watching them. How they respond in their days of conflict will be a witness for the Lord they serve.
Let Everything be Done out of a Spirit of Humility and Servanthood: Team members should think more highly of the other person than of themselves. If they approach conflict with a servant’s heart and with a spirit of humility and prayer, the decisions made in an attempt to resolve the conflict are more likely to be godly decisions.
Let Everything be Done to Seek the Best for the Other Members: If team members understand their ministries in light of the fact that they must desire the best for their other brothers or sisters, then the decisions they make are likely to be healthy and wise decisions. Rather than seeking to put their own desires first, they seek to put the best result for the other people above their own inclinations. Sometimes this “best result” means expecting confession and repentance from an erring individual.
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Phillip Connor was my guest on last Friday’s episode of Strike the Match. We had a great conversation about the new Pew study on the 2010-2050 growth projections of the world’s major living religions. Check out our conversation and subscribe at iTunes or through RSS.
